Friday, April 17, 2015
107th day of the year.
There are 18 days remaining until Cinco de Mayo (Z Chihuahua race?)
There are 23 days remaining until Mother's Day
Today is Bat Appreciation Day, Blah, Blah, Blah Day, National Cheeseball Day, Ford Mustang Day, DNA Day and National Haiku Poetry Day
SATURDAY IS Husband Appreciation Day, Record Store Day, International Juggler's Day, National Animal Cracker Day, Amateur Radio Day and Newspaper Columnists Day
Friday's Birthday Cake:
Victoria Beckham (41)
Jennifer Garner (43) (Birthday Trivia: In college, Jen studied __________________ A) chemistry B) acting C) gardening)
Saturday's Birthday Cake:
Suri Cruise (9) (SOMEONE SHOULD TELL TOM SO HE KNOWS)
Kourtney Kardashian (36)
THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW
Fat Got Your Tongue: Byron Schlenker and his 14 year-old daughter have set new world records for having the widest tongues. His measures 8.6 centimeters across while hers is 7.3 centimeters. Byron's tongue is 2 centimeters wider than an iPhone 6.
We hear that the Samsung Galaxy S6 Edge has completely sold out. SUCK IT iPHONE
All of the following celebrities are already running around with their own Apple iWatches
Neil Patrick Harris
Some high schoolers are being made to sign dance contracts before they can attend their prom. The document outlaws close contact and booty poppin'. The contract, or "Statement of Student Responsibilities.
Ryan Gosling has dyed his hair black for a new role
- The Hollywood Reporter claims Ryan Gosling is in talks to join Harrison Ford in the Blade Runner sequel
Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel may raise their son in Montana.
CNN's Dr. Sanjay Gupta is now recommending the national legalization of marijuana. Although, I'm going to need a 2nd opinion from Dr. Dre.
NEW STARWARS TEASER IS AWESOME!!!
The Japanese airline ANA is painting some of its jets to resemble R2-D2 from Star Wars. I HEAR DARTH VATOR HAS A NEW HELMET IN THIS ONE!!!! MAY MARC JACOBS BE WITH YOU!!!
New Movies Opening Today
Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 (Rated PG) ...
Monkey Kingdom (Rated G) ...
Unfriended (Rated R) SCARY
Horsin' Around: The Kentucky State Police recently arrested Michael Kimmel for riding a horse through the town of Betsy Layne while drunk. He tried to flee, but was easily caught
HOW DID HE DO THAT?
White House Defends Secret Service In Gyrocopter Incident ... 61-year-old Douglas Hughes landed a gyrocopter on the west lawn of the U.S. Capitol on Wednesday. The Riverview, Florida postal worker had been planning his flight for awhile. Hughes was arrested after he landed. He claimed he was there to deliver letters to Congress about campaign finance corruption.
HOW DID HE DO IT? the copter flew "under the radar''
61% of people lie on a first date. Other findings:
- 37% of women lie about their age
- 29% of men lie about their income. On average, they boost their salary by 20%
- 18% of men lie about previous relationships
A woman was booted from a Southwest Airlines flight yesterday after she poked a snoring man with a pen. The woman was trying to silence the man. Medics said the man was fine. The Chicago to Boston flight was delayed for two hours. Cops may file charges
CHARGED Up: A Leuven, Belgium restaurant recently charged Gitte Denteneer for warming up a bottle of milk for her 2-month-old son. They added a 54-cent electricity charge to her bill.
Driving Me Crazy
A new survey by AAA reveals that the average person drives 29.2 miles per day. Other findings:
- the average person drives 10,658 miles per year
- men spend 25% more time driving than women
- men drive 35% more miles than women
- people drive an average of 25 miles per day in the winter and 30 miles per day in the summer
Disorder In the Court: A London courtroom was evacuated yesterday because someone passed gas. A judge had just sentenced Dave Dennett to 14 months in jail for assault when the loud fart caused everyone to laugh. The judge stopped the proceedings and cleared the courtroom because of the horrific smell.
Reporter Nick Frame tells the Mansfield and Ashfield Chad: “The judge handed down the sentence and then paused to let it sink in. And in that silence, someone farted. We tried to stay composed but eventually everyone started laughing. It was like the back of a classroom.”
Cops in Trouble Over Rock, Paper, Scissors!
At the Chili Fest, a country music festival in Snook, Texas, an alleged underage drinker apparently avoided a ticket by beating an officer in a game of rock, paper, scissors! In the video, the girl who'd allegedly been drinking won the game by throwing rock while the officer went with scissors. The crowd around the pair of competitors erupts with delighted screams and the girl looks relieved when she realizes she's won. Two other police officers are among the spectators. Problem is that video has gone viral and the three officers are all in hot water.
Unbelievable x-rays reveal bizarre things naughty pets eat.''
a German pointer ate a kebab skewer
a dog ate a phone charger
a pit bull ingested a knife
a frog ate 30 rocks from his habitat
a Jack Russell Terrier ate a 10-inch bread knife
a terrier ate headphones
Survey: "What's the most unusual thing your dog has ever eaten?"
Today's Question: "40% of blind daters would not go on a second date with someone who had this. What is it?"
Extra Clue: your friends and family might comment if they saw your date in a picture with this
Extra Clue: nothing to do with a criminal record
Extra Clue: appearance
Final Clue: neck up
Answer: crooked teeth
Kelly Clarkson Says Growing Up Her Family Struggled And Lived Paycheck To Paycheck
911 Call; Airline Worker Gets Stuck In Cargo Hold; Calls For Help ... an L.A.-bound Alaska Airlines jet returned to Seattle after the pilot heard banging inside the plane's cargo hold. A ramp agent got stuck inside the aircraft. The agent was OK. Alaska Airlines is investigating. The agent fell asleep